Thursday, April 17, 2008

Heaven and Hell




Subject: Heaven and Hell

A  GREAT READ!

HR Heaven and Hell

One day while walking down the street a highly successful HR Director

was tragically hit by a bus and she died. Her soul arrived up in heaven

where she was met at the Pearly Gates by St. Peter himself.

"Welcome to Heaven," said St. Peter. "Before you get settled in though,

it seems we have a problem. You see, strangely enough, we've never once

had a Human Resources Director make it this far and we're not really

sure what to do with you."

"No problem, just let me in," said the woman. "Well, I'd like to,"

replied St. Peter, "but I have higher orders. What we're going to do is

let you have a day in Hell and a day in Heaven and then you can choose

whichever one you want to spend an eternity in."

"Actually, I think I've made up my mind, I prefer to stay in Heaven,"

said the woman.

"Sorry, we have rules..." And with that St. Peter put the executive in

an elevator and it went down-down-down to hell. The doors opened and she

found herself stepping out onto the putting green of a beautiful golf

course. In the distance was a country club and standing in front of her

were all her friends - fellow executives that she had worked with and

they were all dressed in evening gowns and cheering for her. They ran up

and kissed her on both cheeks and they talked about old times. They

played an excellent round of golf and at night went to the country club

where she enjoyed an excellent steak and lobster dinner. She met the

Devil who was actually a really nice guy (kinda cute) and she had a

great time telling jokes and dancing. She was having such a good time

that before she knew it, it was time to leave. Everybody shook her hand

and waved good-bye as she got on the elevator. The elevator went

up-up-up and opened back up at the Pearly Gates and she found St. Peter

waiting for her.

"Now it's time to spend a day in heaven," he said. So she spent the next

24 hours lounging around on clouds and playing the harp and singing. She

had a great time and before she knew it her 24 hours were up and St.

Peter came and got her. "So, you've spent a day in hell and you've spent

a day in heaven. Now you must choose your eternity," he said. The woman

paused for a second and then replied, "Well, I never thought I'd say

this, I mean, Heaven has been really great and all, but I think I had a

better time in Hell." So St. Peter escorted her to the elevator and

again she went down-down-down back to Hell.

When the doors of the elevator opened she found herself standing in a

desolate wasteland covered in garbage and filth. She saw her friends

were dressed in rags and were picking up the garbage and putting it in

sacks. The Devil came up to her and put his arm around her.

"I don't understand," stammered the woman, "yesterday I was here and

there was a golf course and a country club and we ate lobster and we

danced and had a great time. Now all there is, is a wasteland of garbage

and all my friends look miserable."

The Devil looked at her and smiled. "Yesterday we were recruiting you,

today you're staff..."

 

 




8 comments:

Erin said...

How did you get a hold of the Government of Alberta's hiring policy??

YesBut said...

Human resources - the words say it all, just another commodity.

Hope Walls said...

The Boss's Wife is a HR guru. I forwarded this to him but he didn't respond...

Catmoves said...

I really don't know much about HR, but loved the joke.

alphonsedamoose said...

Erin: I know people who work for the government.

alphonsedamoose said...

YesBut: Unfortunately that is the truth.

alphonsedamoose said...

Ticblog: Expect a pink slip in your next pay envelope.LOL

alphonsedamoose said...

Cat: Glad you enjoyed the joke. Why do I think you know something about HR? HHMMM?