Thursday, January 24, 2008

Fwd: Fw: Jeff Foxworthy - Canadian Humor

          
A Little Canadian Humor

Forget Rednecks, here is what Jeff Foxworthy
has to
say about Canucks



If your local Dairy Queen is closed
from September
through May, you may live in Canada.



If someone in a Home Depot store offers
you assistance
and they don't work there, you may live in Canada.



If you've worn shorts and a parka at the
same time,
you may live in Canada



If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation
with
someone who dialed a wrong number, you may
live in Canada



If 'Vacation'
means going anywhere south of Muncie for
the weekend, you may live in Canada.



If you measure distance in hours, you may
live in Canada



If you know several people who have hit a
deer more
than once, you may live in Canada



If you have switched from 'heat' to 'A/C'
in the same
day and back again, you may live in Canada



If you can drive 90 kms/hr through 2 feet
of snow
during a raging blizzard without flinching,
you may live in Canada



If you install security lights on your
house and
garage, but leave both unlocked,
you may live in Canada



If you carry jumpers in your car and
your wife knows how to use them,
you may live in Canada



If you design your kid's Halloween costume
to fit over a snowsuit,
you may live in Canada



If the speed limit on the highway is 80km
-- you're going 90 and everybody is passing you,
you may live in Canada



If driving is better in the winter
because the potholes are filled with snow,
you may live
in Canada



If you know all 4 seasons: almost winter,
winter,
still winter and road construction,
you may live in Canada



If you have more miles on your snow
blower than your
car, you may live in Canada.



If you find 2 degrees 'a little chilly',
you may live
in Canada



If you actually understand these jokes,
and forward
them to all your Canadian friends & others,
you definitely live in
Canada






6 comments:

Lin said...

How come he didn't say anything about "if you know what a serviette is ..."?

Anonymous said...

I guess this isn't an extract from the Canadian Tourist Board brochure - Visit Sunny Canada

alphonsedamoose said...

Lin: I don't know. It would have been a good one to add.

alphonsedamoose said...

YesBut:Don typo think these highlight sof Canadiana would attract people. We do get some sunshine with or snow.

Anonymous said...

The sunshine reflects OFF the snow. That's our only source of vitamin D.

This post is brilliant, Moose. I love the "assisting at Home Depot" line. LOL That has not only happened to me, I've actually done it myself.

alphonsedamoose said...

Babzy: I thought a lot of the lines were true. Especially about the weather and it be a wee bit chilly.