Friday, June 13, 2008

ways to maintain healty insanity

Ways to Maintain A Healthy Level of Insanity. 

 At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down. 

Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.

Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask If They Want Fries with that. 

Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It "In." 

 Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions,Switch to E spresso. 

 In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write " For Smuggling Diamonds" 

 Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy."

 Dont use any punctuation 

 As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk. 

Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face. 

 Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go." 

Sing Along At The Opera. 

 Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme? 

 Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play tropical Sounds All Day. 

 Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In The Mood. 

 Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom. 

 When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won!, I Won!" 

When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling 
"Run For Your Lives,
 They're Loose!!" 

Tell Your Children Over Dinner. "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go." 

And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity.......

Send This E-mail To Someone To Make Them Smile. 
Its Called .......


YesBut said...

Here's a good one:

You go up to a stranger in the street, and ask them to give directions to a well known location. After they've finished disagree with them and give alternative directions. Finish by saying "If you want to get to (name of location) its best not to start from here.

Oh, just thought of another one, this is really good, even though I say so myself:

You start by

alphonsedamoose said...

I like the first one. You forgot to finish your sentence on the second one.

YesBut said...

I don't like it when people start saying something then say "never mind".

(or don't finish sentences) :)

alphonsedamoose said...

YesBut, I agree with you. When they don't finish sentences it sort of leaves you hanging. Unless of course you know they have a warped and twisted mind and did it on purpose. LOL

YesBut said...

Hi Alphonse
Everything OK with you, haven't seen you blog for over a week?

alphonsedamoose said...

Hi Yesbut, everything is fine. Just extremely busy at work these days. Also on a later shift.I just don't seem to have the time or energy to do much posting.Hopefully things will slow down later and I can find the time to do more than just read quickly through the blogs.
Thanks for he concern. I will try to get something done in the next few days.

Lin said...

Cute one, Moose, we can never display enough insanity in our daily lives.

Sorry it took so long to drop by - seems like everyone is having a tough time keeping up with summer this year. I'd almost like to say "Hope things are slowing down at work" but I know you'd prefer to make hay while the sun shines and before that long winter hits again.

alphonsedamoose said...

Lin. Yup, this is the time of year we make our money, so busy is good. It will slow down in a few months.

ticblog said...

This piece was actually based on a true story. Someone followed me around one day... ~smirk~

alphonsedamoose said...

I've paged myself over the intercom.LOL